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I've got a new LJ, ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) mshcherbatskaya, which, yes, I did choose that name just to be difficult, why do you ask? One or two of you will no doubt recognize it. For some reason I have developed an attachment to that ungainly heap of consonants, so I'm keeping it.
I just feel like this here journal has become too much a catalog of failure, so much so that I actively avoid logging into it anymore. So, I'm going to start a BRAND NEW CATALOG and that will fix everything.
What brought this on? Well...
--I just got offered a new job (which is nice, but how many times have we heard that before?)
--I got a new rat and one of my rats is dying. (Again, how many times?)
--I have "decided" not to go back to school again.
--I have a thrice-yearly Crazy in progress again. (Not as bad as it has been in the past though.)
--The list of things I used to do and love that I no longer do and love, things that are recorded in this journal, is way too long.
--I got on the scale this morning and, I kid you not, I weigh 99 fucking pounds. I am just kind of...*hands in the air.* I told my mom and she's doing a great job of not freaking out and not nagging me. Those of you trying to lose weight are welcome to send it to me Priority Mail and I will reimburse you for shipping.
So! Clearly the solution for this is a NEW LJ!
I have no current plans to shut this LJ down, I just won't add to it any more.
If you want my change of address, so to speak, go ahead and friend the new one and I will friend you back. I will be porting various things into the new LJ, some from here and some from other locations, so content will be showing up but some of it may not be current. Communities and shared journals will be friended when I'm properly settled in. |
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I had three second-round job interviews in 24 hours and then got an email asking for a screening interview. After 5 months of unemployment, it feels weird, as though my resume got a boob job and now everyone wants to ask it out on a date, but I haven't changed it at all and the job market is actually trending down here, so WTF? Not that I'm complaining but still, WTF?
Ah, here we go -
If you're intent on scoring and imbibing an exotic psychedelic drug from Africa, please seek out stuff that has been grown organically. If you're planning to acquire a panther as a house pet, make sure it has been housebroken. And if you find it impossible to repress your urge to stagger into a bar and find a stranger to take home for a night of carnal rapture, be sure to practice safe sex. APRIL FOOL! Everything I just said is a lie. Here's my real message for you: You're susceptible to rationalizing risky behavior, which could lead you to do stupid things. I suggest you either postpone sketchy adventures for a couple of weeks, or else get frank feedback from a clear-headed friend before diving in.
Apparently, Rob has noticed me making a colossal prat out of myself on the internet, picking fights with 19-year old boys. Nice to know he's looking out for me.
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So out of the blue, I write not one but TWO fics, both out of video games set in the Star Wars universe.
I really like the game, and I had fun with the fic. That's the important thing with games and fics, right?
The second one is based on a mission in the game where you get in to see an important crime boss by posing as an exotic dancer. I think the dance in the game is supposed to be sexy, but it is just...not. Again, it's Atton-fic.
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OK, so I was playing this game, and I really enjoyed the story, and it happened to be a Star Wars game and I don't even do Star Wars. I'm so un-Star Wars, as a matter of fact, that I keep mis-typing Star Wars. I'm kind of embarrassed, but here it is. Might be kinda squicky for some people, as it includes a torture scene, and not the happyfun safeword kind.
It's about this guy.
( Wet Work )
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For the past two weeks, I have hung out at a coffee shop after an appointment, to have a snack and do some knitting. Both times, I have had men chat me up. Both times I thought to myself, "Why are these old guys flirting with me?" Then I realized that, in all likelihood, they are no more than 5 years older than me.
I went home and shot space aliens on the Xbox like a proper 14-year-old boy and felt better. |
| » You got your gender wank in my fan wank! You got your fan wank in my gender wank! |
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This came up in a discussion amongst a bunch of fanboys gamers male video game enthusiasts of my acquaintance regarding the term "fanboy" - what makes a fanboy, are you a fanboy, is "fanboy" an insult?
They were generally of the opinion that fanboys were ignorant asshole game supremacists, and that very few of them would willingly accept the epithet "fanboy," and none of them would actually claim it.
This struck me as odd, because my feelings and experiences regarding the term "fangirl" are very different. I will unabashedly refer to myself as a "fangirl", a fangirl in multiple arenas, even. I am an Alan Moore fangirl, an anime fangirl, an Oscar Wilde fangirl, a Guillermo Del Toro fangirl, a Battlestar Galactica fangirl, a BioWare fangirl, a BPAL fangirl, and on and on. It seemed to me that, from what I had observed, there was something solitary and competitive about the fanboy, that it was about one fanboy having a bigger weenie greater skill and/or knowledge than other fanboys. And teabagging. Teabagging seemed to be involved as well.
Fangirls, on the other hand, seem to be as sociable as meerkats, and indeed, what is a fangirl without her fandom? And yet I never hear the guys talking about their "fandoms." I don't think the word is even part of their vocabulary. I pointed out this apparent gender difference and was rebuffed, told that I was totally wrong-headed and that fanboys and fangirls are the same, just like policemen and policewomen are the same.
So what do you think? Are fangirls and fanboys different? Maybe this calls for a poll. Shall I make it a poll? Yes, lets.
Poll #1154979 Fan Gender Differences Poll
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 15How do you identify? Do you think the term "fangirl/boy" is derogatory or offensive? Do you think fangirls and fanboys are the same or different? Please elaborate
Mar. 16th, 2008 @ 02:34 am
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| » The Rat Roll Call |
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Because I'm starting to forget their names.
Past
Delilah
Simone
Lucia
Cecile
Beatrice
Tim
Lily
Alda
Rose
Daisy
Violet
Jane
Miss Mink
Bridie
Isabelle
Current
Stella
Dolly
Sophie
Mar. 11th, 2008 @ 10:35 pm
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| » My least favorite thing about International Women's Day |
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The Backwards Baseball Cap Asshaberdashery Fashion Show, starring guys whose company you normally enjoy. Luckily, the forum thread was locked before I got there, as I'm sure there would have been head-esplodey involved. Take Warren from Season 6 Buffy, beat him with a 2x4 made of 100% post-consumer, recycled Stupid, and then put a keyboard in his hands.
"Why don't we have an International Men's Day?"
"Why do you need one?"
"Feminists hate men!"
"No, we just hate YOU."
Fuckwit.
Mar. 11th, 2008 @ 12:37 am
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| » Dolly and Stella had better look out! |
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Liquid Rat Dip
It's a treat, not a treatment.
Feb. 6th, 2008 @ 09:59 pm
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| » Re-establishing my alpha status - a neverending task |
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DOLLY RAT: *runs to corner of room, chews carpet*
ME: PSSSSHT! (That means "No!" for my rats.)
DOLLY: *ignores* *chews*
ME: PSSSSSSSHHHT!!
DOLLY: *ignores* *chews*
ME: PSSSSSSSSHHHHTTT!!!
DOLLY: *ignores* *chews*
ME: *grabs DOLLY, pins her on her back* Who's the boss? Who's the boss, huh?
DOLLY: *squirms*
ME: Who's the boss? Give the boss a kiss! Who's the boss?
DOLLY: *squirms*
ME: Who's the boss? I'm the boss! Give the boss a kiss! Who's the boss?
DOLLY: *licklicklick*
ME: That's right! I'm the boss! Be good! Noooo chewing!! *puts DOLLY down*
DOLLY RAT: *runs to corner of room, chews carpet*
Etc.
In other news, after a night of insomnia and nosebleeds, I am as full of bitterness and self-pity as a Pink Floyd song. My one bright spot (or should I say, my one bright spot that does not chew the carpet) is the fact that I'm still giggling over yesterday's exchange with theodicy, wherein I passed along the term "wankerchief" and received in return the word "twatwaffle.".
Jan. 28th, 2008 @ 12:15 pm
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| » Task-avoidance = POLL TIME |
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Poll #1127422 Dishwashers
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 15Have you ever gotten into a "discussion" with someone regarding the correct way to load a dishwasher? My dishwasher management strategy is too complex to be summarized in such a simplistic manner.
Jan. 25th, 2008 @ 04:05 pm
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| » flowery foods |
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I'm going a little nuts with this, hm?
Silver Cloud Estates sells flavoring extracts of rose, orange blossom, and jasmine. SpiceBarn sells artificial violet flavoring. Monin makes violet and rose syrups.
I found a recipe for vegan ice cream made with coconut milk instead of regular cream.
2 cups of coconut milk (not light)
1 cup of soy milk (or nut milk)
Sweetener of your choice (dry is better)
Vanilla bean seeds or extract
Wouldn't that be good with jasmine extract instead of vanilla, and maybe a little bit of lemon or lime? We actually have one of those dinky Donvier ice cream makers. I'm very tempted to try it.
Fresh ginger and lime would be good too.
When I was looking online, I found a lot of French products that paired raspberry and violet flavors. There was also a plain violet ice cream, I would do that with regular ice cream base, though. And a place in NW Portland sells a beautiful rose gelato. Those Monin syrups would make some lovely milkshakes.
Unfortunately, Vali and Mary, I cannot send any of these in the mail if they work out.
EDITED TO ADD: Ooh, orange flower and cardamom would be nice too. I make basmati rice cooked with coconut milk, sugar, cardamom, and rose or orange flower water for breakfast sometimes. Verrrry tasty.
However, since we are in for a spell of rather chilly weather, I will wait for a warmer day before I try any ice cream makin'.
Jan. 18th, 2008 @ 06:54 pm
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| » (No Subject) |
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Tomorrow I cook. I am telling myself this now so that I will do it tommorrow. Tommorrow I will make a pot-roasted chicken, a half-batch of lamb stew, Ethiopian lentil stew, and white beans with tomatoes and sage.
I have been snacking rather than eating recently, and it's not good.
Jan. 16th, 2008 @ 09:45 pm
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| » (No Subject) |
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I was listening to my Bootleg U class on Shakespeare today and one of the lectures was on the various aspects of Love explored in Shakespeare's sonnets. One way to tell that these courses are pretty good is they make me want to go back and read or watch the plays I haven't read in a while or haven't seen in a while, rather than doing what so many college courses do, which is kill any desire the student has to ever address the given subject again.
The other thing this particular course made me want to do is pop open my Rumi book. I think there is something instructive in comparing the ideas and compositional rigor of Shakespeare's sonnets to the ideas and drunken sprawl of Rumi's work. I think they show off one another to great advantage.
Sonnet XCVII
--William Shakespeare
How like a winter hath my absence been
From thee, the pleasure of the fleeting year!
What freezings have I felt, what dark days have seen!
What old December's bareness everywhere!
And yet this time removed was summer's time;
The teeming autumn, big with rich increase
Bearing the wanton burden of the prime,
Like widow's wombs after their lord's decease:
Yet this abundant issue seem'd to me
But hope of orphans and unfathered fruit;
For summer and his pleasures wait on thee,
And, thou away, the very birds are mute:
Or if they sing, 't is with so dull a cheer
That leaves look pale, dreading the winter's near.
My Worst Habit
--Rumi (translated by Coleman Barks)
My worst habit is I get so tired of winter
I become a torture to those I'm with.
If you're not here, nothing grows.
I lack clarity. My words
tangle up and knot.
How to cure bad water? Send it back to the river.
How to cure bad habits? Send me back to you.
When water gets caught in perpetual whirlpools,
dig a way out through the bottom
to the ocean. There is a secret medicine
given only to those who hurt so hard
they can't hope.
The hopers would feel slighted if they knew.
Look as long as you can at the friend you love,
no matter whether that friend is moving away from you
or coming back toward you.
Jan. 16th, 2008 @ 12:38 am
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| » Want vs. Need |
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The tea kettle with the thermostat on it
Legit boxed sets of Gankutsuo, Ouran High School Host Club, Samurai Champloo,and Battlestar Galactica
BPAL - Chanukkiyah (missed the Yule deadline, so I'd have to Ebay it), Shango, Lampades, Anactoria
A Black Phoenix lavaliere
A Japanese cast iron teapot
A Chinese Yixing teapot
A fancy English teacup and saucer
A place-setting of Japanese dinnerware
A watch in pendant rather than wristband form
A flat-screen TV
An autographed copy of the Psychonauts video game
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Rice
Chicken
Tofu
Chips
Apples
Wellbutrin
Lamictal
Vyvance
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OK, guess which one is my actual shopping list.
Sad.
Jan. 14th, 2008 @ 03:48 pm
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| » I'm trying to sober up, seriously |
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I'm making jasmine tea for myself in an attempt to equalize off of too much very tasty pear brandy and I accidentally poured a cup all the way up to the brim, which meant I had to leave the cup on the counter and very carefully (very, very, very carefully, given how liquored up I am ON ONLY TWO COCKTAILS, MY GOD! HOW SAD IS THAT!) schlurp up the excess until I could actually raise the cup to my lips. This recalled a snippet of long-ago conversation with the Somber Bald Monkey, bcstillman:
SOMBER BALD MONKEY: When we were kids and the cup was too full, my mom used to say, "Bend over and suck." .... There's four words you never want to hear come out of your mother's mouth.
Jan. 12th, 2008 @ 05:08 pm
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| » After a couple of cocktails |
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Actual - MOM: (Looking at mail from Red Cross) Partnership renewal? I just give them my blood!
Barely averted - ME: discourse on the post-AIDs concept of the "fluid bond" commitment.
Jan. 12th, 2008 @ 05:02 pm
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| » Yatta! |
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I found it! My perfect kettle! No more fussing over the pot, trying to get the correct 180 F water temp for my green, white, and oolong teas! We wants it precious, and when we gets a job, we will have it, precious, oh yes we will.
(Yeah, I'm mixing fandoms. I do that. If you prefer, I can re-write the post in lolcats.)
Jan. 5th, 2008 @ 05:58 pm
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| » Entirely successful food experiment! |
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Only you can't tell violetisblue or viedma - it's a surprise! But I can't help bragging about it now!
( Food Porn Yaye! )
Jan. 3rd, 2008 @ 09:44 pm
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